Dear 40 year old me,
How are you doing? I hope that you are well. I hope that you are happy. I hope that you are content with your life. I am not all the time, but I am getting there. I am slowly learning how to live better and be happier with the everyday "mundane" things. I hope that you have embraced your life as a mother and that you have finally learned how to be calm about most things. I hope you are finally on a healthy living path because I am not right now. Do you exercise regularly and eat all your veggies and fruits? I hope so because that's what I am slowly trying to figure out how to do and I hope that I have figured it all out by the time I am you. I hope that you have a good relationship with J and A. You have them now and they are teenagers!! Did I do a good job with them? I worry about that everyday. I hope I taught them how to be patient and well adjusted to changes in life. I hope I have taught them to live a healthy life. I hope that I did a good job with their homeschooling and they are learning everything that they should know about the world. I wish you could tell me if I have done a good job as a mother so that I can stop worrying about that. Can you just give me a hint? I hope that you don't regret everyday the decision we have made about having more children. I haven't fully decided yet, but I hope that 37yr old us has and is happy with her decision. I just want you to not have any regrets about any decisions that I have made. I am going to have to think of you in the future and make my decisions based on you and what you would like to have...can you let me know what exactly that would be? I hope you have finally learned to love yourself and embrace all of your "flaws". And most of all I just hope you are living the life that you always thought you would have.
your younger self