Tuesday, October 18, 2011

It's hard....(Just write #4)

Sitting here. Listening to the rain pour on the roof of my home. It's very soothing. I am trying to calm down. J had his 15m checkup today and it's too much. Too much information for my brain. Too much stuff for me to remember. I need to write it all down somewhere. Thank God my mom comes with me because she remembers a lot of the stuff that was said. I don't know what I would do without the help. We come home and J is screaming. He won't stop screaming. He doesn't want to play. I realize he dirtied his diaper again and he has a bad rash. He moves so much I can hardly clean it, but it hurts so bad. I know it does. I try not to get stressed from the screaming and moving around. It's hard.  I know he doesn't do it on purpose. It hurts, but it's hard. His teeth are coming in all at once. I hope they finish coming in soon. Being a mother is hard. I am trying to handle it, but it's hard. I want to be good at it, but it's hard. I am only human. I make mistakes. I tell myself that it's okay, but it's hard.


5 comments:

Adam said...

hang in there

Ivey League Mama said...

it is hard. but it will be ok.
My now 5 year old was a screamer when she was little. I've been there...it does get better.

Apple said...

Thanks!! It's just the teething right now so I know it will get better. :)

CJ said...

Oh, teething sucks the big one! My little one gets one or two at a time, but they come in seriously slow. I mean SERIOUSLY slow. Hang in there, you're not alone!

Krishann said...

So true. One day at a time. As you said you are human and part of being human is we make mistakes. WE ALL make them. You certainly aren't alone in this one. But we are given the opportunity to learn from them too. Be good to yourself. When my daughter was little I rarely went anywhere without my mother. I was so scared to do it by myself. Thank God for grandmothers :) As hard as it is to do hopefully you are getting a chance to have some time for you. Take care!